I grew up the only child of older parents (who are also 10 years apart), and often felt like an awkward old lady trapped inside a teeny-bopper’s body. I admit, I wasn’t as physically attracted to him as I had been to other partners. Have you ever seen a girl with a hideous boyfriend and thought, “Seriously, how the f$*k did he pull that off? Either he's just a nice friggin’ dude; or being with him boosts her self-confidence. In my case, the age gap was actually a cavernous black hole defying space and time. He’s old and sick now, and she takes care of him (even financially), but she’s still partying and sleeping around. I sometimes imagine what would have happened if I had stayed with my older man. The last I heard, my older ex was in a tumultuous relationship with another 20-something, this time a singer reminiscent of Björk. Courtney Croft, a 26-year-old Nashville-based anthropologist married to a 40-year-old man, explained that while she and her partner didn't encounter too many problems in their personal lives, other people didn't always react well to their relationship."Most of the issues stemmed from other people's initial negative reactions of us being together. I had some people flat out say it was gross that I was with someone so much older," Croft said.
We worked in the same profession, had similar interests, and shared common philosophical views. So what if he was wrinkly, in all the places you might expect? There was zero jealousy on both sides, and I never saw him check out another woman -- due to him being satisfied, of course, but also him being well-seasoned in how to respect the opposite sex. Another lesson in dating: a fling with someone in your professional/personal circle is more often than not bad news. I have a friend who’s been married to someone for more than a decade who is 20 years older than her. This is one small example, but it always means a lot that she encourages me to go do my own thing because she knows that when we are together, our relationship will be that much stronger if we're both allowed the freedom to be ourselves.It's this kind of trust that, so far, is awesome.An age difference can mean you don't always like—or know about—the same TV shows, movies, and books."Our inner-relationship issues have (fortunately) mostly been about missing each other's pop-culture references; I don't understand his 80s movies/song references, and he's never seen a 90s Disney movie. I have found that being with someone older can provide a unique support system; he has gone through a lot of things that I am currently going through (i.e.being out on my own for the first time, the frequent existential crises that you experience in your 20s, etc.) so he is my rock in a way that a person my age might not be able to be," Croft wrote.Croft also emphasized that communication and patience were crucial."Honest communication and patience is key in any relationship, but particularly when there is an age gap; misunderstandings can happen more easily, I think, because of the different places you might be in life. When your partner has considerably more life experience than you, it can feel a little intimidating.